


Second Hand and I'll Rock That Motherfucker

by Mrs_SimonTam_PHD



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adam becomes a hunter, Dean Feels Like His Brothers are Velociraptors, Dean in Panties, M/M, Sam Hates Shopping For Jeans, Shopping, Sibling Incest, fluff (kind of), ncest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-07 14:01:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16855330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mrs_SimonTam_PHD/pseuds/Mrs_SimonTam_PHD
Summary: Sam, Dean, and Adam go to a thrift shop





	Second Hand and I'll Rock That Motherfucker

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on tumblr
> 
> Written for the Thrift Shop Square on my SPN Poly Bingo Card

They needed new clothes. They all did. Most of their clothes were either dirty with stains that will never come out, blood, sweat, and quite possibly monster vomit. So they had to start over fresh.

Some of the things, they bought brand new. Underwear, socks, shoes. Dean picked up a few pairs of panties, squirrelled them away from his younger brothers so that he could surprise them. Sam and Adam stuck to their normal boxers, and they all decided to only buy black socks from now on. They got new boots to fit their feet and then it was time to grab new jeans, shirts, and jackets. Rather than buy brand new, however, the trio decided to go the thrift stop.

Sam and Adam entered the little shop first, holding hands and smiling at each other. The bonus of Adam being only their half-brother is that he looked almost nothing like Sam and Dean. He and Sam were the affectionate ones of the trio, which means no matter what, when they were out in public, they were holding hands and kissing each other.

Did it make Dean, who was bringing up the rear, jealous? Of course, but he also knew that he looked similar to Sam and to Adam- different features from both- and besides, he’s not sure if he could stand holding hands with someone almost constantly. So he did what he felt he did best- supervise.

The three made a beeline for the shirts, first picking up several plain colored shirts in both short and long sleeved to go under the flannels or to wear by themselves. Dean was the only one who picked up printed tees, and they were, as predicted, rock bands. Sam and Adam rolled their eyes and made their way down to the flannels… which, in Dean’s opinion, was erroneously put in front of the books. His two lovers were nerds through and through.

It only took a look from Adam, who nudged Sam, and Dean lost the two of them as they perused the paperbacks and hard covers. Dean raised his eyes to the Heavens, as if to ask God for help, before checking out the flannels for him and Adam. He and Adam were pretty similarly sized, which helped out a lot since Adam was now in Bookland.

Books selected, Sam and Adam returned to their task of obtaining flannels. Sam found several plaid flannels that he liked immediately- and that fit. Sam, more so than Dean and Adam, needed to try things on. Adam held their books, which Dean looked at the titles for and was excited (although he kept it internal) to see that they found a couple copies of Vonnegut for him. He could tell by the titles that Sam picked them out- Sam knew what works they had better than Adam, and therefore there were no duplicates.

Jeans were next. They all had to try them on, because they all had their issues with pants. Sam’s height, Adam’s slender waist, and Dean’s bowlegs all presented their own issues when it came to the jeans. They all selected jeans that would come close to fitting them (they hoped) and headed back to the fitting rooms as one unit.

That’s where things deteriorated again. This time, it was totally NOT Dean’s fault.

It was laundry day, and he had decided instead of wearing a groddy pair of boxers (or a pair of new ones), he wore a pair of soft green panties and both Adam and Sam were salivating, wanting to get their hands on Dean. Dean felt like Chris Pratt in Jurassic World, trying to tame velociraptors. Only, he was Chris Pratt, and his own brothers were the meat eating dinosaurs. He is in trouble.

He managed to promise them that they can tackle him in the motel room later, but that definitely didn’t stop Sam’s large and heavy hand from smacking Dean’s ass when he bent over to try on the first pair of jeans. Adam just smirked and went to try on jeans.

Sam had to return to the rack of denim to find more jeans, which meant time for Dean and Adam to make out against the mirror, both of them wearing a ‘new’ pair of jeans. Sam returned and just ignored his brothers as he slid on a few more pairs of jeans.

In the end, it was determined that a trip to the nearest big and tall store was needed for Sam’s jeans. Sam looked absolutely murderous when they exited the dressing room, but the look softened when Adam stood on tip-toe to kiss Sam’s cheek and rub his arm gently.

They returned the jeans that didn’t fit to the racks before they went to the jackets. Dean and Adam got a couple new leather type jackets while Sam managed to find a tweed suit jacket that fit him, as well as a leather jacket for himself. It cheered up his mood from finding only one pair of jeans that fit him even remotely well.

They browsed around for a bit after finding the jackets. Sam and Adam returned to the books when Dean got distracted by the cassette tape collection over by the front of the store. They returned with more books and Dean added several cassette tapes to their collection of books.

“Did you gentlemen find everything alright?” The woman at the cash register asked cheerfully as she rang up their items. The clothes were folded neatly and the books were placed in a different stack.

“Fairly well,” Dean said breezily, flashing a flirty smile at the clerk.

Sam and Adam looked at each other, rolling their eyes and sighing.

The woman laughed as she continued to fold, stack, and ring up their items. “Tired of being babysat as adults?” she asked the two younger ones sympathetically.

Sam gave her a smile. “Is it that obvious?” he asked sheepishly.

“You two do have the look of ‘why the fuck is your-or-my big brother here with us’,” she laughed. “I get it. Believe me.”

Adam chuckled with her. “Yeah.”

“Is this the new version of Grey’s Anatomy?” she asked, holding up the medical text in question.

Adam shook his head. “Outdated by two editions,” he admitted, “but hey, the older the better when it comes to worth, right?”

She laughed as she placed it expertly in the paperbag. “I suppose so.”

“Med school?” Sam asked politely while Dean watched the numbers on the till go up.

She shook her head. “I’m pre-law,” she admitted, “but I have an interest in the medical field. It’ll help when I get to be in court and studying personal injury cases.”

Sam beamed at her and nodded.

“Your total is $79.99,” she added, everything having been run up.

Dean pulled out eighty dollars out of his wallet and handed it to her. She finished checking them out and shoved the bags across the counter. “Enjoy your day, gentlemen,” she said brightly.

“Oh, I will,” Adam promised her, throwing her a wink and rubbing his hand over Sam’s chest possessively.

She laughed and waved them good-bye before helping the next customer.

They made their way out to the Impala and threw the bags into the backseat before Sam and Dean climbed up front and Adam remained in the backseat.

“To the dreaded big and tall store,” Sam groaned, burying his face in his hands.

“Aww, it’s alright, Sammy,” Dean said, ruffling his hair. “You really need a haircut.”   
“Shut up, jerk,” Sam grunted. “And it’s Sam.”

“Bitch,” Dean said affectionately before he started backing out. “Don’t worry, you can jump me later. In the hotel room.”

Adam chuckled. “Good.”

“God, I love thrifting,” Sam sighed as they drove towards the nearest mall. He reached behind him and took Adam’s hand.

“Same,” Adam agreed. “Dean? Food?”

“You kids hungry?” Dean chuckled. “Fine. We’ll run through the drive through.”

“Why not the food court at the mall?” Sam asked.

“Sounds good,” Dean grinned. “Time to get some pretzels and pizza.”

The trio relaxed as they drove off, an incestuous threesome who gave no fucks and who took care of the things that go bump in the night.   

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr: @lucibae-is-dancing-in-hell
> 
> Comments and Kudos are Shiny!!


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